File: drinking - item number: 0

Msg: 1 Subject: Alcohol Warning Labels The board of health has proposed that warning signs be placed on booze bottles to tip off drinkers about the possible peril of pounding a pint or two... 1. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up with breath that could knock a buzzard off a shit truck at 100 yards. 2. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an asshole. 3. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN. 4. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish. 5. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the boss what you REALLY think while photocopying your butt at the office Christmas party. 6. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning. 7. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell ever happened to your pants anyway. 8. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember) 9. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burn on the forehead. 10. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Psycho.

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Msg: 1 
 
 Subject: Alcohol Warning Labels
 
 The board of health has proposed that warning signs be placed on booze 
 bottles to tip off drinkers about the possible peril of pounding a pint or 
 two...
 
 1. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up with breath 
  that could knock a buzzard off a shit truck at 100 yards.
 
 2. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an 
  asshole.
 
 3. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring 
  story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
 
 4. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.
 
 5. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the boss what you 
  REALLY think while photocopying your butt at the office Christmas party.
 
 6. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers 
  are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.
 
 7. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell 
  ever happened to your pants anyway.
 
 8. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the 
  morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name 
  you can't remember)
 
 9. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable 
  rug burn on the forehead.
 
 10. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are 
  tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named 
  Psycho.

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